Pass me a drink: It’s New Year’s somewhere


Sidney Australia is way ahead of you and your puny 2012 celebration.

Just imagine, you could have already been celebrating by now. But you’re probably sipping a cup of coffee or orange juice instead of tippling a frothy glass of Santorum beer or bottoming out a glass of bubbly.

Gosh, if you were born somewhere else in the universe, you might have celebrated 2012 ions ago, just before taking a dip into a black hole.

Just where in the universe is 2012?

 

On the road again


20111230-161110.jpg

Tina and I are on the road again headed for Chicago.

Tina’s taking her turn driving. We took a short cut a little while ago when we missed a turn.

And by short cut, we added 30 minutes to our trip.

We are back on track now and we are just outside of Xenia, Ohio, which always makes us think of all of you, but primarily Xina.

We had a great time in NC. This morning my brother and his whole family met us for breakfast at a heart clogging restaurant near my parents’ house.

Last night I made a roasted chicken with a gnocchi casserole. It was so damn good.

We have about six hours left in our ride and I’ll be finishing the drive out.

Thanks to all who let me know what you’re up to for the new year. Even it it’s lame, let me know. I’m dying to know.

BAMF: I shot Aaron


Yesterday, Tina and I shot regular-reader and friend Aaron. We met up in downtown High Point, which surprisingly had a lot of great spots to shoot.

Tina and I didn’t have too much time for the shoot, but in the short 30 or 40 minutes, we got some great stuff.

We had to race home to cook for my family. I made a couple pizzas. Regular reader Paul will be thrilled to hear that I made a vegan pie. I used rice cheese and sautéed a bell pepper with mushrooms. The cheese was surprisingly good and authentic tasting.

We also shot a music video with my niece Eva yesterday. We did one last year as well. It’s with a Selena Gomez song, so sharing it is a no-no. But Eva gets to share it with her friends all she wants.

Today’s our last day in the fog. We’re having a great time. We can’t wait to sit in the car all day tomorrow.

I know I missed Wednesdog yesterday. I’m pretty sure I have a legitimate excuse. We’ll get back into full swing next week.

Any New Year’s plans?

What the funny kids are posting


Let’s go with a couple funnies from I have seen the whole of the Internet and Tastefully Offensive shall we?

20111228-091548.jpg

Picture of a sheep reads, “What is love? Baby don’t herd me.” 

20111228-091558.jpg

Picture of a girl leaning next to a pony, reads, “Whatcha thinkin’ bout?” Pony says, “What extending the payroll tax cuts will mean for American Job growth. And Carrots.” 

20111228-091610.jpg

Pic on Facebook of kid holding up cross shaped bread. Conversation below: “You should carve a Jesus into that since Xmas is coming up. Then call it passion of the crust. Ha ha ha, I’m laughing at myself now.” New kid says, “Father, son and whole grain toast.” first person returns: We’re going to hell unless we get down on our knees and bagel for forgiveness.” Father please forgive us for we have Cinnabon’d” 

20111228-091626.jpg

Facebook update from chad reads: Me: *sneezes*. Class: *silence/crickets.* Most popular girl in the grade *sneezes*. Class: god bless you sweetheart jesus lord let god protect you from that horrible sneeze.” 

20111228-091653.jpg

Your card of sleeping drunk reads, “I like sleeping because it’s like being dead, without the commitment.” 

Facebook update from Jenny, “I’d rather be pissed off, then pissed on.” Response from first guy reads, “This is one of those times when the difference between then and than is very important.” 

No Trastpassing!



Whelp, in case you were wondering, Tina and I are safe and sound in sunny North Carolina.

We drove down with Talulah on Christmas day. We did the trip in 11.5 hours, which was record time. We only stopped for gas and one bathroom break, and I put on my lead shoes for this drive.

I’m typically conservative behind the wheel, but I got a little anxious to get the trip over.

There’s one short stint of two-lane roads that go through some small towns with stop lights. We stopped in one of those hamlets to get gas. The place was packed. And the people getting in and out of cars were ones you might see at Awkward Family Photos. 

I assumed they were there for last-minute shopping as people were going to their Christmas celebrations. As long as last-minute shopping lists included meth and crack.

Tina, Talulah and I politely take turns peeing. While I was walking Talulah near some grass, I noticed a sign (above) on a fenced-in area behind the gas station.

Tina came out after going in, and I asked, “How were the bathrooms?”

“I dunno,” she said. “The place is sketchy. And I just wanted to get out of there.”

So I went in, and yes, it was sketchy. I wasn’t kidding. There were a lot of people in there. I spotted the bathroom, which was unisex. A woman was coming out, and I moved past her inside. On the door, the sign read, “

Notice to all! This is a public restroom not a spot to enjoy your illegal substances. Please have respect for the employees/customers. Than you and have a good day. – MGMT–

[Oh yeah] ONE PERSON AT A TIME.”

This is not a spot to enjoy your illegal substances.

Go enjoy them elsewhere!

I loved it.

McDonald’s is the place!

We were worried that nothing would be open, and we were somewhat right. McDonald’s was the only restaurant chain that we saw open, except for a food court at a popular stop along the West Virginia Turnpike.

Our last gas stop was on the southeast side of Charleston, WV. We stopped at the McDonald’s there. I looked the drive thru and the line inside and thought, “I’ll gamble on going in this time.”

There’s a reason why West Virginia gets picked on for inbreeding … people there are crazy lookin’.

There were only three people in line in front of me, but they were ordering for families of seven or more. It was brutal.

Family reunion

When we arrived, my parents were all waiting up for us. They strung up a sign that read, “Welcome back Tina and Jeremy! We love you and We talked for a bit, blew up an air mattress and hit the sack.

On Monday, my brother called and asked if we wanted to join him and my SiL to see “Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.”

The closest thing you’re going to get to a review of the movie is, “Do yourself a favor and see this movie.”

I haven’t read the book(s) nor seen the original version. But holy crap this movie is great. Let’s put it this way, It was two hours and forty minutes and I could have easily sat through it again.

Immediately.

It was that good.

Last night, Tina and I drove over to regular reader Aaron’s house. We had a couple cocktails and chatted it up for a while. Aaron’s doing great, in case you were wondering.

Today we’re going to celebrate Christmas with my brother and his family. We’re doing a $20 gift grab bag and having dinner. It should be fun.

That’s all folks!

That’s really all the update I have for now. It’s quiet around here, because I’m soaking up family and friends, which is what I hope you’re doing as well.

Cheers and happy holidays!