Yeshua has risen, and he’s a 95-year-old, hungry Chinese grandma

February 29, 2012

Six days after this woman was pronounced dead, she “reanimated” and leapt out of her coffin looking for some kibbles.

The story:

A 95-year-old grandmother terrified her neighbours in China – by climbing out of her coffin six days after she ‘died’

Li Xiufeng was found motionless and not breathing in bed by her neighbour more than a fortnight after tripping and suffering a head injury.

When he failed to wake her up, Chen Qingwang assumed the frail grandmother had passed away in her sleep, in the village of Liulou, in Beiliu, Guangxi Province.

Recounting his daily visit to bring the elderly lady breakfast, Mr Qingwang, 60, said: “”She didn’t get up, so I came up to wake her up.

“No matter how hard I pushed her and called her name, she had no reactions. I felt something was wrong, so I tried her breath, and she has gone, but her body is still not cold.”

Read on

Via The Daily What! What’s that you say? The daily WHAT????


Looking forward

February 29, 2012

The above is a frame out of some video I’m editing.

The video is a real, in-your-face docu-drama about two extremely fortunate people who brag for two point five minutes about how much fun they’re having in Bali.

There are tears, laughter, screaming, yelling, splashing, temper tantrums, and more laughter.

Stay tuned.

My assistant editor wants a stab at cutting it shorter.

“Good luck,” I told him.

“Good luck.”


How the tables have turned, Mr. Old Joke Stereotype

February 29, 2012

I saw the above Facebook update the other day and it made me laugh.

Guy says, “Jason is packing to leave for Warsaw, Poland for a week.”

First response from some girl: “Poland???? Wow, that will be very cool … how long you there”

Hate to break it to you Michelle, but Jason told us how long in his update.

And I thought girls didn’t listen. Now they don’t read either?

When I was growing up, the dumb people jokes were commonly Polack jokes.

That I’m aware of, I never met a Polack before I moved to Chicago, which is chockfull of Polacks. But that didn’t stop me from laughing at Polack jokes.

I mean, how do you get a one-armed Polack out of a tree?

Wave.

Hahahaha.

One time I was driving with Tina and I accidentally blocked another car from pulling through an intersection while traffic was stopped in front of me. The girl in the other car opened her window and said, “Get out of the fucking way, you Polack!”

Tina will never let me live it down.


Sweet! I got my 7D back.

February 29, 2012

Some of you may have read that my backup camera body, a Canon 7D, died in transit on our way to Bali.

When I pulled the camera out to use one day, it wouldn’t turn on. I was pretty upset.

For one, I was considering only bringing that camera body, and not both. The 7D not as good of a camera as my Canon 5D Mark II, but it’s pretty great. It has a built in flash (the 5D does not), which makes it a little more versatile in some situations. And if all my equipment got lost or stolen, I wouldn’t have to replace everything.

But I’m glad I brought both. Even though the 7D became two pounds of dead weight.

I take it back, I brought lenses for it that I wouldn’t have brought for my 5D, so it became about ten pounds of dead weight.

After getting home and checking the warranty, the camera was exactly a year old. I was worried that Canon wouldn’t honor the warranty.

But they did. They fixed it pretty quickly, and now I have my backup camera in full working order … just in time for Luis V.’s wedding in March.

In related news, here’s some test footage between the new Canon C300 and the Canon 5D Mark II. The C300 is supposedly positioning itself to revolutionize digital filmmaking.

Drool.

I’m personally hoping my ship will come in before the Canon EOS-1D X is released.

If I get my hands on that one, I’m inviting all of you over for a big photoshoot. Nudes are optional. And I promise to give you at least one sweet shot of yourself. :)


Lady Justice is a gold digger

February 29, 2012

Graphic shows an Ex-mortgage CEO sentenced to 40-months of prison for $3B fraud and a homeless man gets 15 years for stealing $100. 

Via TYWKIWDBI


Humpday Nooner: Gimme a mouth full of Nasi Goreng

February 29, 2012

If you ever find yourself with a Balinese menu in your hands, or a Balinese section at an Asian restaurant, I strongly recommend ordering Nasi Goreng, which is a Indonesian fried rice. Make sure to order it with an egg or two on the side, too.

The eggs seal the deal.

There’s also a noodle version of the dish, called Mei Goreng, which is equally great.

I had Nasi Goreng three times for breakfast during our nine days in paradise. It was so gee to the dee good.

We found two Balinese restaurants in Chicago that we’re going to try soon.

The above shot was from the most expensive hotel/villa we stayed in, which is why the presentation is about as classy as if my name were Bill Gates or Newt Gingrich or something.

 


Oh neat. A video on Leap Year.

February 29, 2012

Left to its own devices, tracking dates via our current system would render all our precious dates, like your birth, my birth, Yeshua’s birth, a pointless exercise.

It’s a good thing we humans are so forgiving.

Via I have seen the Whole of the Internet


Happy Leap Year!

February 29, 2012

Any of you readers a Leap Year baby?

Do you know anyone who is?

My memories of Leap Year growing up were largely affected by a field trip to Morehead Planetarium in Chapel Hill, NC. I was in elementary school, and I remember being fascinated by the experience of laying back in our seats and looking up at the stars they projected onto that big dome ceiling.

I must have had a few dollars to buy a souvenir with me, because I bought a little metal calendar in the gift shop. There were two pieces to the calendar that rotated, and depending on where you placed the dial, you could have all the days, including a leap year, for whatever year you pointed it at.

The leap year thing intrigued me, and having a remedial understanding about something as fascinating (to me) as Leap Year seemed to do a doozie in my little noggin.

And, just to be a jerk and throw a dig in toward “Intelligent” Design, wouldn’t an intelligence create a perfect system of Earth rotating around the sun? Seriously. How adding one 24-hour period to the equation actually makes up for the difference is beyond me. Surely it’s not just 24-hours off.

I can’t say that I would be awe-struck if 365 days were a perfect, unchangeable effort. I’d be impressed though. Especially if that number were biblical and perfect.

Just sayin’.

Have a great Leap Day. If you need my address to send my leap year gifts, I don’t mind giving it out again.

Honk.


It’s Wednesdog!

February 29, 2012

This very special Wednesdog is brought to you by the magical dogs of (wouldn’t you know it) Ubud, Bali. There’s one thing for sure, the Balinese seemed to love their pets. There were pet shops for dog and cat food everywhere. That’s something I’ve never noticed in any other third world country.

The dogs in Ubud intrigued Tina and I.

Imagine a busy, narrow, two-lane road. Add to that road a ton of pedestrian foot traffic, a slew of cars, buses, and motor scooters. Kind of like this scene here (but often worse):

There’s really not enough room for foot traffic. And then imagine there are small packs of dogs, wandering up and down the street.

But they never get hit by cars or scooters.

Why?

Because they’re … magical!

On Valentine’s day, Tina and I sat at dinner watching a pack of dogs walk up and down the dark street. They were able to avoid traffic and politely let themselves pass people up and down the road. They were protective of each other in a way that I’ve never seen before. Sometimes one seemed to stop and make sure there was enough room between a moving car and the pack. Other times, one would look for traffic while the rest followed lead.

It was something to see.

Here’s a bad shot of a couple canines here.

And just to get the dogs of Bali out of my system, there was the case of the below puppy. He was so mad at me for descending onto his family’s property. He barked and barked at me.

One more note about foot traffic in Bali — because they drive on the opposite side of the road as we do — when you’re walking down the street and someone is walking toward you, they also expect to pass you on the opposite side that you’re used to. But, I found that passing a tourist, it could go either way. If I passed a local, I made an effort to go left. But if they were white, I tended to wait for them to decide. Aussies drive on the same side of the road, but other Europeans don’t.

Just thought I would throw that in.

 


Stevens Creek pastoral staff: I’m not creative and I know it

February 29, 2012

Do you want to be rich? Did you know tithing will make you rich?

Well, not you. But that guy behind you.

Or, it won’t make you “rich” in the monetary sense, but in the, I feel good because god loves me rich.

Lemme break some news to you … that’s not “rich.”

Via

 


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