Yeshua has risen, and he’s a 95-year-old, hungry Chinese grandma


Six days after this woman was pronounced dead, she “reanimated” and leapt out of her coffin looking for some kibbles.

The story:

A 95-year-old grandmother terrified her neighbours in China – by climbing out of her coffin six days after she ‘died’

Li Xiufeng was found motionless and not breathing in bed by her neighbour more than a fortnight after tripping and suffering a head injury.

When he failed to wake her up, Chen Qingwang assumed the frail grandmother had passed away in her sleep, in the village of Liulou, in Beiliu, Guangxi Province.

Recounting his daily visit to bring the elderly lady breakfast, Mr Qingwang, 60, said: “”She didn’t get up, so I came up to wake her up.

“No matter how hard I pushed her and called her name, she had no reactions. I felt something was wrong, so I tried her breath, and she has gone, but her body is still not cold.”

Read on

Via The Daily What! What’s that you say? The daily WHAT????

Looking forward


The above is a frame out of some video I’m editing.

The video is a real, in-your-face docu-drama about two extremely fortunate people who brag for two point five minutes about how much fun they’re having in Bali.

There are tears, laughter, screaming, yelling, splashing, temper tantrums, and more laughter.

Stay tuned.

My assistant editor wants a stab at cutting it shorter.

“Good luck,” I told him.

“Good luck.”

How the tables have turned, Mr. Old Joke Stereotype


I saw the above Facebook update the other day and it made me laugh.

Guy says, “Jason is packing to leave for Warsaw, Poland for a week.”

First response from some girl: “Poland???? Wow, that will be very cool … how long you there”

Hate to break it to you Michelle, but Jason told us how long in his update.

And I thought girls didn’t listen. Now they don’t read either?

When I was growing up, the dumb people jokes were commonly Polack jokes.

That I’m aware of, I never met a Polack before I moved to Chicago, which is chockfull of Polacks. But that didn’t stop me from laughing at Polack jokes.

I mean, how do you get a one-armed Polack out of a tree?

Wave.

Hahahaha.

One time I was driving with Tina and I accidentally blocked another car from pulling through an intersection while traffic was stopped in front of me. The girl in the other car opened her window and said, “Get out of the fucking way, you Polack!”

Tina will never let me live it down.

Sweet! I got my 7D back.


Some of you may have read that my backup camera body, a Canon 7D, died in transit on our way to Bali.

When I pulled the camera out to use one day, it wouldn’t turn on. I was pretty upset.

For one, I was considering only bringing that camera body, and not both. The 7D not as good of a camera as my Canon 5D Mark II, but it’s pretty great. It has a built in flash (the 5D does not), which makes it a little more versatile in some situations. And if all my equipment got lost or stolen, I wouldn’t have to replace everything.

But I’m glad I brought both. Even though the 7D became two pounds of dead weight.

I take it back, I brought lenses for it that I wouldn’t have brought for my 5D, so it became about ten pounds of dead weight.

After getting home and checking the warranty, the camera was exactly a year old. I was worried that Canon wouldn’t honor the warranty.

But they did. They fixed it pretty quickly, and now I have my backup camera in full working order … just in time for Luis V.’s wedding in March.

In related news, here’s some test footage between the new Canon C300 and the Canon 5D Mark II. The C300 is supposedly positioning itself to revolutionize digital filmmaking.

Drool.

I’m personally hoping my ship will come in before the Canon EOS-1D X is released.

If I get my hands on that one, I’m inviting all of you over for a big photoshoot. Nudes are optional. And I promise to give you at least one sweet shot of yourself. :)

Humpday Nooner: Gimme a mouth full of Nasi Goreng


If you ever find yourself with a Balinese menu in your hands, or a Balinese section at an Asian restaurant, I strongly recommend ordering Nasi Goreng, which is a Indonesian fried rice. Make sure to order it with an egg or two on the side, too.

The eggs seal the deal.

There’s also a noodle version of the dish, called Mei Goreng, which is equally great.

I had Nasi Goreng three times for breakfast during our nine days in paradise. It was so gee to the dee good.

We found two Balinese restaurants in Chicago that we’re going to try soon.

The above shot was from the most expensive hotel/villa we stayed in, which is why the presentation is about as classy as if my name were Bill Gates or Newt Gingrich or something.