Mister Baits, Meet Miss Switch.

It’s happened to you. Come on. Admit it. You’re in the car, listening to a song. You tap your foot and bump the steering wheel. You think to yourself after the song is over, “That was a pretty good song. It’s cheesy, but whatever.”

You make a stop and you’re humming the tune.

Later on, you’re on your way home from the grocery store, the song comes on again (thanks ASCAP). You turn up the volume. You mumble hum a couple lyrics you remember. You think to yourself, “Man, I think I really like this song.”

After the song ends, the DJ comes on and says, “You gotta love that new one from Miley Cyrus!”

Deflated fart.

For real?


I don’t know whether to rip out the stereo, throw it on the pavement and bludgeon it with a sledgehammer or to call my 8-year old niece and say, “Hey! How’s it hangin’ or whatever you kids say [short pause] Okay ‘SUP!’ Hey, Anyway, it’s me. Your uncle Jer.  Just wanted to let you know, you and I have something in common. Guess what it is [pause]. Nope. Guess again. [pause] Um, no I stand to pee. One more guess [pause]. Yes, we both love and adore Miley Cyrus and have plastered her posters and magazine cut outs all over our rooms!!!”

[Insert high-pitched girly Michael Jackson squeal fest]

Then we’d join hands through the phone and sing, “… and the Jay Z song was on … and the Jay Z song was on.”

Should we turn Tina on to Zack Efron, the apocalypse is truly nigh.

Did you think “Mister Bait” was going to mean another “Maturbation” story. Gotcha!


I know. I lost cool points with you. Whatever. Go turn on your glory day song oldie that I don’t like and would make fun of if I heard it on your stereo, jerk. I can fall for the media circus once in a while. Tina would tell you that happens more often than she’d like. I unabashedly love top-forty hip hop. I am secretly a 12-year old girl in a 34 year old male body.

Shhhhh, don’t tell any body.

If you’re so inclined, I’m posting the video below the fold.

7 thoughts on “Mister Baits, Meet Miss Switch.

  1. I like that romeo & juliet song by Taylor Swift.

    Anyway, I heard that there is a line in this song about listening to a Jay-Z song. Miley said in a recent interview that she’s never even heard one. I wonder if she has any control over her song writers.

    1. I didn’t know that about Jay-Z.

      What’s that new song from Shakira? Ask Dan. You commenTweeted the other day about Dan and Shakira. I kinda like that new song too.

    1. Awesome! I can’t tell you how often I can’t even tell what the fuck artists are singing. I couldn’t tell that she was saying anything about a she wolf. Now it makes sense.

      Thom Yorke’s the worst at having great lyrics that I can’t understand at all.

      1. And Thom Yorke, or any Radiohead song, is known for not putting the name of the song in the lyrics…very hard to figure out.

  2. I really can’t happily listen to most of what I hear on “top 40” radio. Put “country” into the mix and you’ve lost me completely.

    Don’t get me wrong. I do enjoy new music by new artists, but the vocalist has to be something other than whatever popped out of the cookie-cutter they’ve been using since they made Debbie Gibson and Tiffany. And the “boy bands”?!?!? Please, someone give laryngitis to anyone hoping to be another “Backdoor Boy”, or whetever they are.

    I guess it comes down to the difference between a musician who writes and/or sings, and a plastic face that the record company puts in front of whichever studio musicians will work for scale that day.

    Am I being too cynical?

    1. I don’t think you’re being too cynical.

      There’s something in me that is drawn to music that I don’t like to admit I like. It’s an embarrassing plight I’ve had to deal with. 🙂

      I was at a Polish bar for pool the other night, and the music that was played was Euro-trash hip hop dance mixes. I don’t know what the real name for the genre might be. All I know is, there is something in me that is drawn to it.

      I’ll have three different people in my car, and all four of us disagree on what good music is. Just like “My Blog My Rules”, My Car My Rules. So if you don’t like the music in my car, get another fucking ride. Either that or I’m going with NPR, which is what I would be listening to most of the time anyway.

      On that same note, I can’t figure out why anyone would be drawn to Sarah Palin or Glenn Beck, but these people exist in the world and they exist in large number. There’s got to be a scientist somewhere studying why some people are drawn to things, people, music, items, foods, cultures, etc. while others are completely repelled by them.

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