I woke up Thursday morning with a subconjunctival hemorrhage. Holy shit, I need a manicure.

Last week Thursday I had a client meeting to review a cut of a video I’m editing. This marked two weeks since I was there and the night before I burned the fuck out of my hand. My hand healed fine (thanks for asking). But wouldn’t you know, I woke up with a subconjunctival hemorrhage the day of my next meeting with that same client.

The hemorrhage simply means that a blood vessel popped in the white of my eye. I was a little embarrassed about it, but these things happen, and the best thing to do is go about your day. People will see it, and if they care to know what it is, perhaps they’ll ask. Otherwise, it’s let ’em gaze at it and be happy it didn’t happen to them.

In fact, I brought it up to my main contact while walking to the meeting, and she said that she’s had several. One time she was lifting a stack of brochures, and she claimed she felt it happen. She’s much younger and cuter than I am, so if it can happen to her, it can happen to anyone.

My subconjuntival hemorrhage (click to enlarge)

Since Thursday it’s grown, but it’s pinker rather than redder. Over the weekend, I had Tina snap a shot for posterity. The shot is to the right.

It means I should probably get an eye exam. The list of causes ranges from pressure on the eye or a sneeze to high blood pressure. My blood pressure during the day has been ranging in levels higher than it should — around 130 over 85 –, so it’s important that I get that under control. In the morning and at night, it’s been pleasantly in regular ranges. I have been a little stressed out over some work-related issues, so it might be correlative.

I noticed in the shot that Tina took, my finger nails look outright disgusting. I’ve never gotten a manicure before, but suddenly I thought, “Maybe now’s the time.” To add grossness to this post, I probably should get a pedicure, too. I rarely cut my toe nails. I tend to rip off the nails. Lately I’ve been swimming, and while I’m sitting in the Jacuzzi it’s hard not to.

All that said, I probably won’t do it.

How many guys do you know who have gotten a manicure or pedicure? Which do you think will end first, the social stigmas associated with homosexuality and gay marriage or heterosexual males getting manicures and pedicures?

I’ll end with this five second clip of Stewie getting a subconjunctival hemorrhage.

8 thoughts on “I woke up Thursday morning with a subconjunctival hemorrhage. Holy shit, I need a manicure.

  1. During my drowning/seizure incident I blew out the whites of both eyes, no white left that could be seen… a totally demonic look that took several weeks to finally clear up completely.

    As one RDC put it, “DAMN BOY! You got the devil in you?!?”

    Good times.

  2. I’m a gay man and I’ve never had a pedicure or a manicure 🙂

    It maybe a Chicagoan metrosexual super secure in his sexuality kind of straight boy thing to have one 🙂

  3. Geez – you’re falling apart! And don’t listen to Petursey – he really wants to get a pedicure…deep inside there’s a little voice saying “Petursey…groom me…). 😉 My Hubby would get pedicures every other day if they didn’t cost $25-60 a pop – and he’s a down-home boy from the wild ‘burbs of Minneapolis, not from some fancy smancy uptown city place.

  4. Hey Glock, you gotta spill the beans on that drowning/seizure incident. You act like we’re all in the know, and we’re all in the dark. It sounds thrilling.

    I can’t believe your Remote Desktop Connection said that. That’s crazy. 🙂

    I realized now that I’ve looked at the shot of me holding my eye ball open that I was recently working the dough for my pizza minutes before. THAT’s why my finger nails look even grosser than they usually do. There’s dough all up in the cuticles.

  5. Long story, was the result of an accident in naval boot camp (RDC = navy drill instructor, aka recruit division commander). Most of the story I only have 2nd hand accounts of, and the rest is difficult to talk about. But the “devil eyes” was one of the more humorous parts of the aftermath.

    1. It has sexily moved closer to my iris. The other night at an art show, a friend told me I looked like mafia and that my eye made it look like I had just killed someone.

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