It boggles my mind that if a man built Noah’s ark today, it must meet modern standards of safety according to this NYTimes article describing a Dutchman who built a Noah’s ark tourist
Even though the thing can’t sail, the eyesore attracts an astounding number of people willing to shell out their hard-earned money to see the parade of lunacy that is Noah’s ark.
Noah’s ark is a reminder of the completely impossible. It’s a reminder that many people believe that all of humanity are the product of incest upon incest, and that all the populations from China to Africa to Europe and the Americas come from a five-hundred-year-old man and his 480-year-old sons.
Somehow all that is supposed to make you feel better. It’s supposed to make everyone respect you when you repeat that you think it’s literally true. Despite all the evidence to the contrary, that there was no global flood, that all animals would never make it to one place on earth and re-disperse back where they originated.
It’s magical, though, isn’t it. And there’s a draw to magic like nothing else.
The same reason people are willing to line some guy’s pockets to see an unsailable boat is the same reason people are willing to pay Sarah Palin’s daughter Bristol $262,500 to be the spokeswoman for abstinence-only pregnancy prevention education. They shell out another $160,000 in advertising fees, and a measly $35,000 to actual clinics.
The Palin’s need to take that magic act to Vegas.
Despite all the evidence that Bristol is not fit for abstinence-only pregnancy prevention leadership, she’s placed on a pedestal to the tune of more money than most people make in several years.
That is a mean slight of hand, you guys have there. Show me how you do that.
Abstinence-only pregnancy prevention should hire me. I produced zero children outside of marriage. Hell, I can’t produce a child within marriage.
That alone should make me ten times more qualified than Bristol Fucking Palin.
When I reached the dating age, my head was chockfull of abstinence-only education that completely
fucked screwed manipulated my view of sex and marriage. I have that working for me.
I can be charismatic and entertaining if I try. Also a plus, right?
Where’s the address for this organization? I’m sending them my resume.
In the meantime, someone hook me up with the magic it takes to make money off deceptions like these.