Dateline covers atheist circle jerk in Texas, shows how we talk incessantly about religion

The results are in: atheists talk about religion far more than even religionistas do.

And we don’t shut up.

I am exhibit number uno. I mean I never shut up about it.

What would happen if religion ever died? We’d be so bored, we’d invent religions to be mad about.

Just watch the video above. It validates all these points and more.

I mean, were you aware at how geeky we all look. Take any frame in the video, and we appear to be a homely lot of godless nerds.

Own up, kids. This is who you choose to associate with.

Via 

 

You will win and you will lose

Yesterday I talked about fucking up a sound file for a high-profile client video. There was a chance we’d reshoot the piece today, but that didn’t happen. Scheduling the CEO was too difficult.

I would be very surprised if the client ever called me again. So I gotta chalk up the failure AND a lost client.

I hope no one ever mistakes me for someone who doesn’t own up to their blunders. I take failure very seriously, in myself and others. And I failed hard on this one. There’s no question about that.

But it didn’t kill me. And it’ll likely be something that never happens again.

The good news is that I finally had a chance to go to Apple about my phone. They replaced it no questions asked. I’m updating it now. In the interim, I had a beater phone. Every time someone texted me, I would call them back if it was more than a one or two-word response.

Going back to keypad texting was really tough.

The reason I didn’t go to Apple until today, was their reservation service was always backed up. We had traveling and a heavy schedule, so I needed a little better window than one or two days out.

I made my reservation with a “genius” for 1:30 p.m. It was so crowded and over “reserved” that I waited 30 minutes before seeing anyone. It seems like a conspiracy that I can’t go to an AT&T store to have them replace my phone. Thirty minutes in an Apple store is the rough equivalent to forty nights for a nymphomaniac at a whore house.

But I resisted all temptations and only left with what I wanted, a working iPhone.

We stopped at Jewel on the way home for a couple groceries we needed for dinner. I saw a cashier who reminded me of a story I meant to tell you.

One time, I was checking out. The cashier was a man, in his late 30s to early 40s. He was geeky looking. There were stains on his burgundy-colored Jewel shirt. His name read something like, “Marty.”

Marty asked for my ID. I had beer in my cart. I handed it to him. He handed it back and said, “1975. That was a bad year.”

“Oh yeah?” I kind of laughed to myself. “What happened?”

“My parents got divorced,” he said sharply.

The rest of the check out experience was [sing-song] awkward.

I hope you didn’t lose any clients today. And something you wanted to happen happened. And no one told you bad news about their parents divorcing in 1975.

Or, hell, that you told someone bad news and made an awkward situation more awkward.

Islam holds Temper Tantrum Carte Blanche

Some Muslims are upset about a recent ballsy move from a French satirical paper called Charlie Hebdo. The paper published a special “sharia” edition and claimed it was edited by the prophet Muhammad.

The front page featured a caricature of him.

You know them’s fightin’ words! A couple of Allah lovers

Molotov cocktail bombed the paper’s headquarters, and they’ve made world headlines.

It’s like the whole world’s a bar, and the kids who pray to Allah get in the most fights and they don’t have to pay for damages at all the brawls they start.

Molotov cocktail bomb.

Someone should pull the Islamic folks aside and explain to them — like the children they seem to be — that reacting to their big brother or enemies like babies gets even more ridicule thrown your way.

It’s easy peasy psychology. Most kids know this. How is it that grown adults are so ignorant of playground politics?

Read more about the incidents below.

Via The Daily Wh.at and [guardian / telegraph / photo: afp.]

 

 

It’s Wednesdog!

Today’s Wednesdog crosses into the evil northern country … USA’s ear flapped hat if you will.

Wait a second! Let’s pass Canada and head into the even more evil Quebec — which is more like another country than most of you will ever know.

Regular-reader and awesome Wednesdog contributor Jude sends us this photo of Sam and Anna after they hoofed it up to Montreal’s namesake, Montreal’s Putain de Merde Tabernac Mountain.

That’s the technical term for this lovely mountain. If you look just behind Sam’s ass, you’ll notice the biggest load of Merde you’ve ever seen.

Honk.

Jude says,

Behold the beauty of Sam and Anna!
In this shot, they’re resting after climbing the mountain that Montréal is named after (see above). You can see the eastern side of the city in the background.

If you’re googling the name of that mountain, slow down killer. I’m accurate in all my posts and with everything I write.

Happy Humping Wednesdog, ya’ll!