You know how some people see numbers and think there’s some divine significance?
Or like every time it’s 12:19, Tina says, “It’s my birthday.”
Or every time it’s 8:08, she says, “Gimme a kiss.” Or, “Com’ere and eff me.”
Well, every time it’s 3:14, I get a tingle in my tongle.
And by tongle, I mean brain.
And by brain, I mean …
By the way, we got our new Bed, Bath and Beyond catalog in the mail yesterday. Why do they even include the words, “Bed” or “Bath”?
The pages are jam packed with the “Beyond”.
I mean, iPad radio clocks, record players, high-def video cameras, handheld vibrators, battery operated wine-bottle openers … oh wait … that place is more for the bedroom than I ever imagined.
There’s a pillow that has an iPod hookup. That way when killers smuggle their victims, they can put on their victim’s favorite playlist. Maybe even Slacker or Pandora.
They think of everything at that store.