Hey Kirk Cameron, the Black Eyed Peas wrote “Shut up” to you … so just shut up!

Oh gawd, Kirk Cameron feels oppressed! Poor little guy doesn’t feel that he can say what’s on his mind without getting backlash.

He’s only telling people what his lord told him to tell you.

Isn’t he?

I mean, no one is telling him to shut up. His god also wrote into the book to expect such fallout for expressing these views. So why the ruckus?

Why in the world is Kirk Cameron whining like a little baby?

Because he wants everyone to think like him? Because he doesn’t like that his ratings have plummeted since his stint on that dumb 80s show?

How quaint.

World Net Daily is reporting Kirk Cameron’s befuddlement over the issue. You can read the article here. It’s called “Kirk Cameron fires back” by Drew Zahn. You can read how Zahn helps Cameron “fire back” for yourselves, but I want to comment on one part of the article, and it’s this one (emphasis mine):

When Morgan asked Cameron his views, the actor told the host, “I believe that marriage was defined by God a long time ago. Marriage is almost as old as dirt. And it was defined in the garden between Adam and Eve – one man, one woman for life, till death do you part. So I would never attempt to redefine marriage and I don’t think anyone else should either. So do I support the idea of ‘gay’ marriage, no I don’t.”

Do you know that the story of Adam and Eve doesn’t mention marriage one time?

And do you understand the ramifications of believing that Adam and Eve are responsible for the earth’s population of humanity and what that means about the sexuality of our supposed first humans? Adam and Eve had kids, and ostensibly they had kids. But who did their kids have sex with? Each other, right? Maybe with their mom and dad?

How dare anyone, especially Kirk Cameron, declare the Genesis couple as THE DEFINITION of PROPER, DIRT OLD “Godly” marriage.

Because if I used Adam and Eve as a model for marriage, I would likely go to jail or get committed for improper sexual relations with family.

What in the world are Christians doing by citing Adam and Eve as the role models for relationships?

If Kirk Cameron is hoping to dispel the rumor that Christians aren’t a bunch of in-bred idiots, he’s clearly barking up the wrong goddamn tree.

Hey Kirk, when you’re done defining marriage using the dumbest part of the bible, could you help me out with where the bible writes anywhere that god defined it in the way you are being persecuted for?

I don’t want you to shut up. I love when you talk. It gives me fodder for the blog.

Thanks. Bye.

It’s Wednesdog!

This week’s Wednesdog is brought to you by regular-reading Glock21. At the time of posting, I’m not sure what Glock calls this little fella or, um, gal fella.


Glock’s dog is named “Bentley”. Please feel free to insert Bentley where I’ve written “Glock’s Dog”.


Glock offers us this photo with the following words:

Our family dog can never decide which toy he wants more… so he’ll go through hell and high water to get both.

I don’t know about you, but I count three toys in Glock’s dog’s mouth, a blue one, a yogurt container and a human arm.

What is Glock into that he can provide human arms for his dog’s hell or high water enjoyment? Suddenly Talulah wants me to shop at the same pet store as Glock. It’s really quite embarrassing.

Whatever the case, if your leg doesn’t get humped today, plan on humping someone else’s. Greet all your friends with a butt sniff. And, oh yeah, poop outside for a change and pick it up with a plastic bag.

If you don’t pick it up, people will get angry.

Dinner blog: Quick Beef Wellington

And you thought I forgot that this was “Le Café” Witteveen.

This was our dinner on Monday night, a recipe I found in America’s Test Kitchen 30-Minute Suppers from 2010. It’s the Quick Beef Wellington.

It’s something I wanted to make for what feels like years. And I finally convinced Tina to try it.

The recipe seems like it would be disgusting. There’s pâté (not silly pâté like that old SNL commercial. Real pâté). And the beef is deli roast beef. How can this be good?

Well, it’s good because ATK is badass.

The recipe is below the fold. And if you make it, be sure to check in and let me know how it turned out.

Bon Appétit!

Continue reading “Dinner blog: Quick Beef Wellington”