How do you elevate public discourse

Yesterday I wrote some thoughts about #PussyGate.

The topic has infiltrated my brain and I cannot stop thinking about it. I’ve seen that Jerry Falwell Jr. is supportive of trump. Pat Robertson.

These are Christian leaders, and they aren’t giving much more than a frown to Trump. These are the people, the leaders, who should be elevating the public’s standard of morality by criticizing the man. Criticism doesn’t mean that they can’t still support him. But not criticizing him makes me think that they lack any relevance in the morality game. They should hang up their hats.

This is not the leadership that I grew up with.

When I was growing up in an evangelical Christian home, our parents, teachers, Sunday school teachers, and leaders were constantly teaching us about moral behaviors.

One time in High School, I was the president of our academic association. During an induction ceremony, each member of the association tapped new members during the induction part of the hour. Since I was president and to give a speech, I was seated on stage facing the rest of the student body. A teacher had given me a name of a student that I was to tap. We were told to locate that student in the crowd before hand so that we could tap them efficiently.

During an opening prayer, I must have kept my eyes open to search for the guy I would tap.

After the ceremony, one headmaster pulled me aside and said we needed to talk. He told me that he saw that I had my eyes open during the prayer. He explained that leadership means that when other students are watching, especially younger ones, it’s essential to do everything right. That means, closing your eyes because someone watching might misconstrue that behavior.

I felt like shit.

I still close my eyes during prayers, especially when my nieces are in the room. Even though I don’t pray to any god, I find it’s essential to be a good influence on them. I think that doing my best to expose my nieces to positive behavior, to be culturally aware, is positive. Of course if we ever had a discussion, I would gladly explain my position on god. But that’s not on the table when all they know is each meal is opened with a prayer.

We were also taught to respect women, sex, and our speech about both in both private and in public. To this day, I’m not sure I’ve ever participated in so-called locker room talk. I’ve heard some pretty shitty things said. And I’ve even asked guys to stop talking bullshit.

I’ve been on photo sets with women as naked and shaven as the day they were born, and I go out of my way to make sure I don’t do or say creepy shit … why? Because I was taught that leaders, upright men and women, don’t talk in a way that might upset another person.

We treat people the way we want to be treated.

Right, Jesus?

We were taught that was as essential to act above reproach even when no one was watching, because “God” was always watching. He was everywhere. That’s what we were told. That’s what we believed. I couldn’t masturbate without a level of guilt that Jesus was watching.

I still feel guilty when I think some thoughts. It’s residual conditioning from the discipline of my youth.

Our teachers taught us that immoral thoughts were as sinful as actions. In fact, there was no difference in the sin of thought versus action.

How many times was I told that? Let me count the times!

Another time after a basketball game, my coach gave me an earful after I lost my temper on the court. Losing one’s temper was a complete lack of proper public behavior.

But these same coaches, teachers, parents and leaders aren’t so much as criticizing a man so rife with sin, whether or acted upon or thought, that their hypocrisy is absolutely befuddling me.

That makes me wonder about this entire process of raising kids a certain way, but once they’re adults, let certain folks do whatever the fuck they want.

As long as a “law” isn’t broken, all’s fair in love and war and presidential campaigns.

Where are the leaders in the church, where are the teachers and parents who should be pulling Trump to the side and calling him out? Either publicly or privately?

Do you want to know why I was criticized for certain behavior? Because of “love.” The people around me wanted me to succeed. To guide the greater good, having people behave less like animals and more like civilized people makes for a better public discourse. When you’re part of a team, the leaders of the team might look at a weaker player and say, “Hey, you gotta improve this aspect of your play.” It’s not to piss that person off, it’s to help the rest of the team look better. To help the rest of the team win.

So why is it considered poor behavior to criticize Trump?

He’s a part of a team, a team that is getting leveled and battered for being the lousiest losers in the country.

If I could pull the whole of the world aside, I would advise them to behave less like quiet animals quietly enabling people like Trump to raise their standard of public and private behavior to a higher, less, well, um … a less deplorable standard.