I have the keys to success, but you can’t have them

My last post detailed a conversation I had with my friend “Don” about politics. I can’t stop thinking about it. It kept me up last night after I suffered through the last night of the RNC. What a shit show. What a boring, flaccid excuse for a deadened heartbeat.

That last speech was paint drying at a Catholic church service. I’ve heard golf claps louder than the applause last night. I think the standing ovation was the ecstatic feeling you get when the torture is finally over and those weirdos could go home and bask in the glow of their imminent positive Covid-19 results.

But that idea that no matter what Trump does or says, it’s excusable so long as he supports Pro-life. That is blowing my mind.

I read this morning about yet another Falwell scandal. This time, Becki is accused of slipping into her son’s friend’s bed and giving him blowjobs. What stuck out to me was this:

He said he grew up in a North Carolina home where the Falwell name loomed largeHis mother admired Liberty’s founder, the Rev. Jerry Falwell Sr., and was a true believer in the conservative Christian values that Liberty developed a reputation for cultivating in young people. For the then-student, the incident with Becki Falwell incited a long struggle with both his faith and mental health. He said he did not tell family members of the cause of his distress, and only confided in a few close friends.

“It made [him] feel bad. It was a depressing thing; he struggled with depression [afterwards],” the former bandmate told POLITICO.

“I don’t want to be a homewrecker,” the former student said. “That took a toll on the soul.”

This brought back a rush of memories of my own childhood, growing up, being taught from an early age that boners were dirty. That sex was a sin outside of marriage. That impure thoughts were as bad or worse than the act of sex. My sex education at school was a nightmarish horror story of sexual impurity would land me an STD making you dirty, used and unwanted by any decent woman.

It was pounded in my head while my loins surged with hormones. I got boners by riding in a car, sitting in a chair, lying in bed, standing in line, looking at the Sears catalog, combing my hair, playing soccer, doing sit-ups, taking a shower, eating ice cream, making the bed, dusting the shelves, tying my shoes, playing with my toys, building a fort, doing my homework, and sometimes even when I was looking at Victoria Secret catalogs.

The confusion of a blood surged penis mixed with the endless claims of its inherent sinfulness, that the omniscient creator is watching you masturbate … that a throbbing libido when kissing my high school sweetheart, that shit will send you to hell. Give you Gonorrhea dick, warts, crabs and prevent you from purity on your wedding night.

What a goddamn sham.

It took years of therapy before I finally got out of a lot of this brainwashing.

We literally have the answer to decrease and almost eradicate abortion, but the only thing standing in the way is the Christian obsession with abstinence, with anti-sex, anti-birth control and anti-education.

We could literally let go of the asshole in the White House if we all agreed that the only reason we can complain about any of it is thanks to your parents having SEX.

Yep, you have Sex to thank for your life. You have Sex to thank for the shithead in the White House. And Sex Education and Birth Control is the glaring, definitely deciding answer to the riddle of Abortion.

But we can’t have it because the Christians are hiding the keys to the vault. Meanwhile, you have men like me, who were raised with a moral compass that eliminates any ability to fall for Donald John Trump’s raging ego. His sexual indiscretions, heard loud and clear, remove him from ever entering the panel of my mind that bares resemblance to acceptance. His thrice married, multiple sex partners, hushed hookers and association to Jeffrey Epstein create a tall mental wall between him and me. And yet the people who profess this unyielding devotion to him, taught me to hate that behavior without pause.

It is confusing. It’s mentally disturbing. We have division in America because Sex is dirty and Abortion is evil.

But I bet you all of Jeff Bezo’s fortune that we wouldn’t have this jackass in the White House if one party reformed its views on one of the best, most satisfying acts one can do with a partner or with oneself. It’s the head scratcher of all head scratchers.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a boner to go take care of.

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