Over the last few years, I’ve attempted to vLog a little. They’ve always been intermittent attempts to do some kind of behind the scenes or show a snippet of our lives.
When I slowed and basically stopped blogging here, it left a large hole in my, um, spirit, that I’ve since wanted to fill.
In November, I decided that I would produce a weekly vLog — at least — for as long as I can do it.
I’ve been somewhat successful with it, even though the vLogs themselves are far from “professional” video productions. They’re pretty gorilla really. Things I’d never include or do on a pro job, I let slide with these vLogs.
My goal, first and foremost, is to document my life as a professional photographer, a husband, and friend to about two people. :)
I’m not getting any younger. And as the years pass and I look back, the only road I’m paving comes in the form of work for clients with a spattering of personal work. But I’m absent in my own life, because my face rarely shows up in front of the camera.
In full transparency, these vLogs are incredibly influenced by YouTuber Casey Niestat. I’ve even lifted some of his approaches to telling stories from his playbook.
What I like about Casey is that he’s an incredibly creative and prolific content creator, but he does it in a way that’s true to his personality. Love him or hate him, he’s a positive guy and goes out of his way to present himself with a sense of lovable neutrality.
This blog certainly started as a divisive voice and it ended up dividing parts of my personal/familial life that I wished it didn’t do. It wasn’t that I wanted to be anonymous, but I also didn’t want familial interaction to influence my views.
My views regarding the supernatural remain the same. Those views are largely kept quiet except during short discussions with Tina.
Recently, Casey included a quote that means a lot to him. It was, “Never let perfect be the enemy of good enough.”
This is a perfectionist’s conundrum. When I release something to the world, I’m endlessly critical of it. I’ve had to learn, through my career, that nothing I do will ever be “perfect” per se and that when clients and others like something, it’s okay to let go of self criticism that leads to self deprecation, insecurities and even creative paralysis.
The way I see many creative people — including myself — is that they/we are paralyzed by fears and insecurities, even perfectionism. They have a zillion ideas and even criticize those who create, while their own work is minimal or prevented thanks to those fears.
I’m not sure any thing ever gets any easier in this regard.
My next goal is to really push my personal envelope. Put myself out there with more gusto. More Oomph. I think there’s a formula of likability + crazy that creatives must have to set them apart.
I don’t define that crazy as a pejorative. I think there’s good and bad crazy. It’s that je ne sais quoi of likability and anomalous something something. Or maybe I already have it and I just need to keep plowing forward.
The other reason I’m doing it is because I want to be a content creator.
I’d much rather make something for someone else to consume than to consume something.
That’s why I love cooking. That’s why I love photography. That’s why I love making motion pictures. That’s why I don’t like sitting absently in front of a TV.
I haven’t seen a movie in the theater in years.
That’s right. I haven’t seen Star Wars yet.
And it’s killing me.
If anyone is still out there, I’ll do my best to at least publish my vLogs here. Gosh, I miss writing as well.
Before I forget, Happy Fucking New Year, to you and you and you.
Let’s do this #2016.