Sandy brings us three steps closer to the apocalypse!

The above photo was taken at Avenue C on the lower East side in Manhattan. Wow, right?

See the original on Instagram here.

If you’re like me, you’ve been watching the Internets with great curiosity as Sandy unfolded its powerful arms and unleashed the giant storm onto the northeast.

As she used her fire-hose powered water cannons protruding from her mile-wide nipples and sprayed water and winds over the northeast.

I’m no bible scholar, but I get the feeling — from an ignorant reading of biblical text — that the apocalyptic end of the world is coming soon.

Every second. Every minute. Every hour. Every week. 

Every month.

Every year.

Every two years.

Every decade.

Every … shit … what comes between decade and millennia?

Centurion ski boats?

All I know is, the more time that passes between Jesus’s promise and a cataclysmic storm like Sandy … excuse me … a providentially-predicted storm like Sandy … we get closer to the almighty return.

We don’t know the hour. We don’t know the place.

But we do know that “this generation” — this one right now! — will not pass before Jesus returns.

Even so, when you see these things happening, you know that it[d] is near, right at the door. 30 Truly I tell you, this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened. 31 Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.

Keep in mind, it might be the next generation, just in case this one passes and the next one starts.

But be ready!

It’s coming. And perfectly natural disasters are ushering us closer and closer to the pending apocalypse.

By the way, I am not relieved that Cindy Jacob’s prayers were unanswered.

That means only one thing.

We are alone.

While Jesus is trying to beat Ba’al’s Angry Birds score.

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Image via JMG

The Republican National Convention

 

Last night, I watched or listened to most of the Republican National Convention in Tampa. If you were up by your computer last night, I kept a running live blog of it.

When I was finished, I looked it over, and it desperately needed editing. So I removed it over night. But it’s back up now.

 

And fortunately for all of you, I was so impressed.

I was impressed at how shallow all the speakers were.

I was impressed at how childish they think their audience is. The first woman I heard speak spoke slower than anyone I’ve ever heard. And if I weren’t cooking at the time I would have taken more notes.

I was impressed at how white the crowd was. Yes, there’s an Asian man in the shot above. And Artur Davis spoke. Oh! And I saw an Asian woman.

Praise, Jesus.

I was impressed that their women were so influenced by the male dominated mindsets of “conservatism.”

How any woman stands up for the crap that tea-partiers or Republicans claim as “good”, I have no idea.

The overall theme was to make vague bullet points complaining about the current administration, brag about personal successes in the cities or states that they represent, only to find that speakers may have been less than factual.

Chris Christie is leading his party as the speaker of truth, no matter how hard it hurts. The guy is a glorified preacher. He speaks well — really well — but I’m afraid I don’t believe him at all. When you claim great things about the first part of your term, it likely is no thanks to you. It’s thanks to the last guy.

I know this editorial called  “How the Republicans built it” comes from that nasty, elitist rag The NY Times, but take a read.

Among the notes:

Gov. Chris Christie of New Jersey, in the keynote speech, angrily demanded that the American people learn the hard truths about the two parties, but like most of those at the microphone, he failed to supply any. He said his state needed his austere discipline of slashed budgets, canceled public projects and broken public unions, but did not mention that New Jersey now has a higher unemployment rate than when he took over, and never had the revenue boom he promised from tax cuts.

“We believe in telling our seniors the truth about our overburdened entitlements,” he said, but his party has consistently refused to come clean about its real plans to undo Medicare and Medicaid. “Mitt Romney will tell us the hard truths we need to hear to put us back on a path to growth,” he said, but Mr. Romney has consistently refused to tell the truth about his tax plan, his budget plan, and his health care plan.

I mentioned my small business below. And I’m friends with many small business owners in Chicago. Are they afraid of opening a new location because of Obama tax restrictions? No. From the NY Times article above:

“We need a president who will say to a small businesswoman: Congratulations, we applaud your success, you did make that happen, you did build that,” said Gov. Bob McDonnell of Virginia. “Big government didn’t build America; you built America!”

That was far from the only piece of nonsense on the menu, only the most frequently repeated one. Conventions are always full of cheap applause lines and over-the-top attacks, but it was startling to hear how many speakers in Tampa considered it acceptable to make points that had no basis in reality.

Finally, for the entirety of the RNC to point a finger at the EPA as the demon who keeps their states and businesses from thriving, this alone is going to kill the Republicans. Firstly, there are many businesses who have gone green who are thriving — not just surviving.

Should Republican religionistas take one long look at that Bible of theirs and understand that we are stewards of the Earth, and not rapists of it, we might do well to take some notes.

And yet, it’s that same religion that Republicans cite as the rationale to destroy the planet … all while blaming meany, meany Obama and his Nazi EPA.

How childish.

[In a super whiney voice] “Maaaaa-ummmmm, Obama won’t let me pump chemicals into the atmosphere!”

The best thing about the party is that they are split into two. And while they’re doing their damnedest to keep it together. Having one side willing to dangle teabags from their hats and the other side to wear dunce caps … the liberals look like angels.