Joe My God sings the hits

Newt Gingrich would like to remind everybody that marriage is between one man and one woman whom you abandon riddled with cancer on her hospital bed while you fuck the shit out of your mistress whom you later marry and cheat on with a third decades-younger woman while screaming with Godly moral outrage about the infidelities of the president.

Read/see the rest


Romney wins handily in Illinois

Romney decisively won in Illinois yesterday. Romney’s the guy I figured would go head to head with Barack Obama, and I imagine that he really has a chance, so long as his Mormonism doesn’t turn off the Republican, conservative Christian base, which it should.

I told you I grew up in a house where literature against Mormonism could be found on the living room coffee table, right?

There were rumblings of freethinkers in Illinois calling to vote for Santorum yesterday, as we all think Obama would wipe up the election against and ask for more bread after it was finished.

Here’s the delegate standings so far:

Just before you go, give yourself a minute to try and digest this video of the Duggar family showing their support for Santorum (below). I can understand if adults choose Santorum, but having a universal consensus among all your children seems to border on abuse of some kind.

“You cheer for Santorum or you’re not a real Duggar!”

Can’t you just see the parents now, with their hands up the bodies of the kids, working their mouths? Yeah, me too.

Jim Henson would be proud.

Video via JMG

A followup: the Republican debate in 100 seconds.

The Santorum saying his name part is, wow, just wow.

Even this clip is loaded with the fear-mongering. Check out Santorum’s inability to keep eye contact.

The only thing I’m missing is the shots of Gingrich sitting there with his pudgy arms wrapped around his round belly as he picked his teeth with his tongue thinking about his failed marriages.


Somewhat short, relatively ignorant review of last night’s Republican debate in Arizona

Apart from clips on the Internet, which really don’t count, I haven’t watched any of the Republican debates. I’ve wanted to, but managed to miss them every time.

So when I heard about last night’s debate with only four candidates, I thought I better tune in.

Let me be up front. I can’t stand Rick Santorum or Newt Gingrich. And after last night, I still can’t. And while I’ve read and understand a lot of the criticisms for Ron Paul and Mittens, I have a softer spot for those two.

Paul ain’t your average bear. I had my eye on him the last election, and felt impressed by him. Fellow atheist Cynical-C posts lots about his racism and other downfalls.

Since Mitt Romney seems more middle of the road, like Obama (to many of us social liberals, but obviously not social conservatives), I can get somewhat behind him.

Romney behaves less shady on camera. Did you notice? He gives everyone eye contact. He speaks plainly, and though he douches up the political hullaballoo left and right, at least he tracks you with eye contact. Gingrich, Paul and especially Santorum, are always looking down and around. They are scratching their balls and wondering what they are going to say next. Romney gets a thumbs up for sitting right between two dickheads who ganged up on him several times and looking them right in the face when they belittled him.

One thing I like about the candidates is that most of them speak very clearly, unlike George Bush. And I’m not talking about his southern drawl. Bush was the live action Elmer Fudd. In one sentence, I could go from Bali and back and he’d still be stammering on about “‘merica” and “turrarists”. Santorum was the candidate who hosed the audience with long, drawn-out responses, and Romney was correct to say things like, “Well, I don’t know if I followed all of that, but …” and then hit some points.

If I had to vote for those guys, I’d vote for Romney, then Paul, then Obama, then Margaret Thatcher, then Pol Pot, then Gingrich, then Satan, then Santorum.


I’m sure all the pundits and talking heads tackled the hell out of the debate last night and will cover it today. I don’t watch that shit. Here are the notes I took while I was cooking last night listening to/watching the debate.

  • I’m was offended by Mitt Romney’s use of the words, “Adoption Business.” I’m adopted. Don’t remind me that it’s a business. That there’s a price on the heads of babies and kids who need homes with loving families.
  • Abstinence-only programs for teenagers? What! We should encourage sex in that group! Where the fuck hell are the abstinence programs for the Catholic priests! Where are the abstinence programs for all the conservative American men who patronize whores, cheat on their wives, frequent brothels overseas?
  • Michele Bachmann was extremely quiet during this debate.
  • Often, the candidates went into meandering rants, but if they wanted to reel it in, all the candidate had to do was criticize Obama, and voila! Applause and hoots!
  • Maybe I heard it wrong, but didn’t Gingrich and Santorum both say they’d blast the hell out of Iran despite our American general’s recommendation for diplomacy?
  • In my naivety, the only candidate with a chance to beat Obama seems to be Romney. But what I am scared of is that it’s actually Santorum. I can’t see the entire Republican base and Independent swingers pulling for his idiocy. But after talking to some republicans and their inability to NOT vote republican, I could be wrong. I apologize for the double negative.

That’s it. I’m sure I swore profanities during the discussion on the “War on Faith.” This country is free to believe in any way it wants to the point of tipping in the favor of Christianity, even under Obama’s perceived reign of terror.

These candidates are great at one thing: fear mongering.



Ooooo Newt Gingrich’s pants are on *fire*

Remember when liar, liar pants on fire Newt “I’m a liar” Gingrich told the world that he could furnish character witnesses regarding his wish for an open, swingin’ marriage?

Well, he can’t produce any witnesses.

As The Daily What wrote:

In other words, [CNN’s John] King, who practically handed South Carolina to Gingrich, may have just played a critical role in taking Florida away.

In all fairness, the network in the driver’s seat is CNN, so you have to weigh in the extreme liberal bias at play (and at work) here.


Dan Savage sings the hits

Dan Savage speaking at IWU

From this article at, Dan Savage says:

Well, we’ve been seeing this throughout the campaign, where Bachmann and Romney and Perry and Santorum, they’ve all been challenged not by activists or gay organizations, but by individual voters. … Increasingly LGBT people are empowered, not ashamed,” he said. “They’re attacking us, and we’re confronting them. We’re holding them accountable and calling them on their lies and their ‘pious baloney,’ to borrow Newt Gingrich’s phrase. America is waking up to the fact that we’re not bogeymen, and we’re not coming to do any harm, and that we’re your daughters and sons and neighbors, sometimes your parents, your co-workers, friends, colleagues. The Republican party, in this desperate [nod] to its dying evangelical base, is just ramping up the homophobia, and they’re doing themselves real long-term damage.

“What’s interesting is that, you look at who’s been doing the most hate speech: Bachmann? She’s out. Herman Cain? He’s out. Perry? He’s all but out. Santorum? He’s running fourth, he’s trailing even in conservative South Carolina,” Savage continued.

“It’s not winning them the election anymore. It’s not 1992; Pat Buchanan can’t get up and give a ‘gay rights never, family values forever’ speech at the Republican National Convention anymore. Times have changed.


Newt Gingrich answers questions about marriage, trust, fidelity

Newt says, “Trust my sexual proclivities and reformation cuz I’m a grampa [spit, ding].”


Also of note is this post at The Daily about the composer for Rick Perry’s Strong commercial being a gay Jew with a tendency to promote communism.